Many of you know about the journey I had undertaken within the last couple of months. I decided several months ago that the best thing I could do for myself was separate myself from the church. Many of you also know that I decided recently to return to church. Now, my blog post isn't about why I returned; many of you will be frustrated I went back, most of you will be happy I've come back. Whatever my reasons, the point of this post is to address a major misunderstanding in the mind of church members, as most non-members seem to understand why a lot of church members have left the church.
I've seen a lot of blog posts and comments, etc. that address why people decide to forget everything they've loved and leave the church, and many of them are just flat out wrong. From what I've read and from the people I've talked with, the majority of people in the church seem to believe that members leave the church because they're "too lazy" to continue to live the gospel, or because they've sinned, etc. The problem with this is that it's usually coming from church members who have never left the church and thus have no idea what's going on in these peoples' heads. While it certainly is true that some people leave the church because they're lazy or become disenfranchised with the church or feel unworthy (among other things), all of my research and the people I've talked to indicate that it is more an issue of the truthfulness of the church than of any of the other issues (though I don't mean to lessen the validity of those other peoples' reasons).
In our days, people are leaving the church in droves because of the one thing they've been taught to trust and love: truth. Now, I'm not saying that their stance is the truth, rather I'm saying that they are leaving the church because of what they perceive to be the truth. The biggest thing in this situation is the fact that the history of the church has been muddled with time. Many church members are taught a very simplified version of the church when, really, the history of the church is complicated. I left the church because of the history of the church. I thought I knew it all from the internet and thought that my viewpoint had to be right. My thoughts were "Joseph Smith couldn't have been a prophet because of [this]," or "the church can't be true because of [this] and [that]."
Many many many people in the church follow this path. I've seen it. Many people believe it's true for so long, but the moment their testimony is challenged by another viewpoint, their "shelf cracks," as many of my Ex-Mormon friends put it. The point is, history is what's getting a lot of church members. Granted, people stop going to church because of other reasons, like laziness or feelings of unworthiness, but so many people are leaving the church because of history than anything else. Like anything, the stuff you find on the internet isn't always true. You'll come across some stuff that is shocking to you but also simply isn't true. Then again, you'll also come across stuff that is shocking to you and is true. Like, for example, did you know that Joseph Smith had fourteen year old wives? Shocking, isn't it? But there's always another side to the issue. We see things through presentism, meaning we look at morals of that day through our own moral lens. And that just doesn't work. Did you know, for example, that it was okay for an older man to marry a fourteen year old at that time? People might have raised their eyebrows at the prospect, but it definitely wasn't unheard of.
That's the thing though; there's always another side to the issue. People have their own biases. People use their own opinions to back up facts. They'll twist them the way they want them to be even though there's no evidence for their opinion. You need to look at the facts objectively. Don't worry about peoples' opinions on the matter, worry about the facts. There's an explanation for everything. Keep looking for it. Talk with people. Examine the issues. And also understand that there's some stuff that we just won't understand.
I believe God exists. I believe Joseph Smith was his chosen prophet to restore the gospel for our day. And I believe the Book of Mormon is true. But most of all, I believe that God can speak to us, and that is why I believe. Look at the issues objectively. Look for answers. Look at both sides. Do what you have to. But in the end, I believe it's true, and that's all that matters for me.
I've seen a lot of blog posts and comments, etc. that address why people decide to forget everything they've loved and leave the church, and many of them are just flat out wrong. From what I've read and from the people I've talked with, the majority of people in the church seem to believe that members leave the church because they're "too lazy" to continue to live the gospel, or because they've sinned, etc. The problem with this is that it's usually coming from church members who have never left the church and thus have no idea what's going on in these peoples' heads. While it certainly is true that some people leave the church because they're lazy or become disenfranchised with the church or feel unworthy (among other things), all of my research and the people I've talked to indicate that it is more an issue of the truthfulness of the church than of any of the other issues (though I don't mean to lessen the validity of those other peoples' reasons).
In our days, people are leaving the church in droves because of the one thing they've been taught to trust and love: truth. Now, I'm not saying that their stance is the truth, rather I'm saying that they are leaving the church because of what they perceive to be the truth. The biggest thing in this situation is the fact that the history of the church has been muddled with time. Many church members are taught a very simplified version of the church when, really, the history of the church is complicated. I left the church because of the history of the church. I thought I knew it all from the internet and thought that my viewpoint had to be right. My thoughts were "Joseph Smith couldn't have been a prophet because of [this]," or "the church can't be true because of [this] and [that]."
Many many many people in the church follow this path. I've seen it. Many people believe it's true for so long, but the moment their testimony is challenged by another viewpoint, their "shelf cracks," as many of my Ex-Mormon friends put it. The point is, history is what's getting a lot of church members. Granted, people stop going to church because of other reasons, like laziness or feelings of unworthiness, but so many people are leaving the church because of history than anything else. Like anything, the stuff you find on the internet isn't always true. You'll come across some stuff that is shocking to you but also simply isn't true. Then again, you'll also come across stuff that is shocking to you and is true. Like, for example, did you know that Joseph Smith had fourteen year old wives? Shocking, isn't it? But there's always another side to the issue. We see things through presentism, meaning we look at morals of that day through our own moral lens. And that just doesn't work. Did you know, for example, that it was okay for an older man to marry a fourteen year old at that time? People might have raised their eyebrows at the prospect, but it definitely wasn't unheard of.
That's the thing though; there's always another side to the issue. People have their own biases. People use their own opinions to back up facts. They'll twist them the way they want them to be even though there's no evidence for their opinion. You need to look at the facts objectively. Don't worry about peoples' opinions on the matter, worry about the facts. There's an explanation for everything. Keep looking for it. Talk with people. Examine the issues. And also understand that there's some stuff that we just won't understand.
I believe God exists. I believe Joseph Smith was his chosen prophet to restore the gospel for our day. And I believe the Book of Mormon is true. But most of all, I believe that God can speak to us, and that is why I believe. Look at the issues objectively. Look for answers. Look at both sides. Do what you have to. But in the end, I believe it's true, and that's all that matters for me.
I think you nailed it mentioning the "very simplified version" of church history. The church itself has even posted essays on the little known (and often very strange to us) bits of history. Then there's the Joseph Smith papers which have so many things that could be seen as good or bad. I am glad to live in a time when all these things are easily available. Letting the light in on so much history not only strengthens my testimony of the church in the past but also that the church in the present is on the right track.
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